Why thinking ‘big’ isn’t always the answer - sometimes it pays to think ‘small’!
We’re so often encouraged to dream big, to think bigger but sometimes what we truly need is to step away from the vastness that feels too distant and overwhelming, and turn instead to focusing on the tiny things.
Because it’s in those tiny things in our daily lives that the secret to making the changes we desire may lie.
As I reflected on this two quotes came to mind:
Firstly, the Dalai Llama
“If you think you are too small to make a difference, you haven’t spent the night with a mosquito”.
Secondly, Fun Boy 3 and Bananarama, who sang the words:
“It ain’t what you do it’s the way that you do it…
it ain’t what you do it’s the time that you do it…
it ain’t what you do it’s the place that you do it…
and that’s what gets results”
And to my mind, they both make important points !
Small things can have a disproportionately BIG impact and sometimes it’s simply a case of looking at the way we do things, and adjusting when & where we do them, who we do them with, how often, etc.
The problem with thinking big
So often when we are feeling a need for ‘change in our life - when we’re feeling stressed, overwhelmed, bored, frustrated, discontent or just plain knackered – we can be tempted into a narrative that we need to FUNDAMENTALLY change EVERYTHING.
And that can feel complicated, gnarly and HUGE.
Like being lost in the forest and not being able to see our way out.
So we put off reflecting on how we could change things, because we believe that it will be ‘too hard’, that we don’t have time, or the capacity or the resources or the energy or the headspace to identify what needs to change, never mind do the things to make the changes happen.
And so we decide that we need to just push on through - hoping that one day we WILL have the time/energy/headspace to work it all out.
And THEN we’ll put ourselves first and take time away from the daily treadmill to contemplate and make a plan.
And THEN – life will become more fulfilling, less draining and you’ll be able to breathe
That’s how I used to think.
So I didn’t change anything.
And I got more and more knackered and frustrated.
Until, that is, the day I suddenly understood…
It pays to go small instead!
You can’t climb a mountain in one giant step (duh!). You have to take lots and lots of small steps. The ‘one small step’ of Neil Armstrong on the moon didn’t happen without a bucket load of other small steps leading up to it. And it’s generally the same in life – if you want your life to feel different, it starts with a small step.
Action is what begets change, however small that action or change may be - and, you don’t have to have it all figured out to get started (what?!)
Doing just ONE little thing differently can end up changing how EVERYTHING feels.
The author and habits guru James Clear gives the example of a plane flying from Los Angeles to New York to illustrate the point. If the pilot adjusts the navigation by just 3.5 degrees south, the plane will land 225 miles adrift in Washington, not New York.
A seemingly insignificant tweak creating a MASSIVE shift in outcome.
Total transformation starts with one small step
In the same way, we can make small, incremental changes in our daily lives that can have significant positive effects.
I see this often with my clients.
A seemingly inconsequential, tiny action, a teeny weeny baby step or a subtle shift in how they do something or are thinking about something, that leads to HUGE light bulb moments and deeply transformational change.
And underneath it all is the shift from ‘hoping’ things will change or get better, to getting intentional and purposeful about making the desired change happen.
Starting with just one baby step.
Leading to another baby step.
Plus, in my experience, taking some intentional action, however small it may seem, gives us a confidence boost, a sense that we are back in ‘control’, making choices and decisions on purpose and with purpose, and that we’re thus heading in the right direction.
Often, this is all that we need.
It then becomes self-reinforcing.
Because when we take action, it feels better, WE feel better and so we become more inclined to take more action. And when we start to see some positive results, that boosts our desire to carry on even more.
And that’s how the ripples from even the tiniest of acts can create BIG impact.
If you’re still not convinced, think about the effect a simple smile from a stranger has on your day…
So, instead of feeling stuck in frustrated and disempowered ‘hopefulness’ (and remembering that from little acorns great oaks grow!) - ask yourself this:
WHAT IF…?
What IF it didn’t need to feel so hard?
What IF you could completely change your experience of your life right now, today, with a tiny tweak, or a wee switch-around, or a slight adjustment?
What IF there was ONE teeny, tiny thing could you do that would make ONE thing in your life feel better/less draining/more nourishing/more soul filling?
Something as basic as reconsidering the way that you’re doing something, or when you do it, or where you do it (going back to 90s Indie-pop) – or do you even have to do it at all?
Over to you… What if…
Choose one thing.
Then go and do it.
It could be as simple as that!